Deborah Jo Ainslie (September 20, 1951 - June 29, 2024)

In loving memory of
Deborah Jo Ainslie
  • September 20, 1951
  • -
  • June 29, 2024

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Obituary

Deborah Jo (Spees) Ainslie entered this world on September 20, 1951 in Milwaukee, WI, a petite thing of only 10 pounds, 4 ounces. She was the daughter of a delightful Southern belle and a heroic Northerner. The day after her 5th birthday Deb received twin brothers, who quickly became the focus of her life. She never quite got over not being able to take them to Show & Tell, though. Deb had what some called a “sickly” childhood, but she knew no different. Any day she could play outside instead of watching others through a window was a good day. That attitude carried her through life. She spent many years as a military spouse and also worked for the U.S. Army. She said the military life was the best thing she ever experienced. Imagine moving to a strange place but knowing you already had thousands of “family” waiting for you. Yeah, it was a great life. She married the true love of her life, James Ainslie, in 1985 at Ft Knox, KY. They had wanted to get married on April Fool’s Day but, alas, Jim was going to be out of town. So instead, they got married on this nation’s most important holiday – Ground Hog Day. It was glorious – ground hogs were in attendance, a blizzard raged through the area, a memorable day. Debbie was raised in the Lutheran church, and cherished her faith. She was a lover of life and all it represented. Although she did not fear death, she never welcomed it – and fought as hard as she could against it. She always had plans for more adventures, more joy, more help for others. You can’t do that from the grave. So rest assured she’s probably a bit miffed about having to leave the party early. Deb was pre-deceased by her beloved brother, Matthew, and the parents she adored, Robert and Lena (Tillie Bland) Spees. Deb is survived by her amazing and devoted husband, Jim; her siblings Donna Arkowski (Christopher Korch), Rhett Spees, Rodney Spees (Deloris), and step-daughter Jamie Brandt (step granddaughters Sophie and Dori). A special shout out to her many nieces and nephews who were her heart and soul. She wants you to know you were her favorite. Be kind, be generous, love.


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  1. Jamie Brandt lit a candle:
    12 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 12, 2024 at 7:54:48 AM

  2. . says:
    07 Jul 2024
    Jim - so sorry to know you have lost your special love. Our lives go full circle, but we have to remember all the times we had together with our best friend. Tom and I provide you our prayers and best wishes for the future. Now, you have to take care of yourself as Deb would have wanted. I bet you have a job. Please stay in touch.

  3. Teresa Evans lit a candle:
    05 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 5, 2024 at 7:52:15 AM

  4. PAM BARNHILL lit a candle:
    04 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 4, 2024 at 7:46:05 PM

  5. Heather and Tommy says:
    04 Jul 2024
    Debbie,
    You will be missed. I enjoyed your light and laughter. You were truly one of a kind. You had me laughing at your obituary! I love that you wrote it - it is a perfect reflection of you and your attitude towards life. I hope that you are now at peace, but still doing lots of laughing!
    Hugs to you Jim. Tommy and I are thinking of you.
    Heather Hayes

  6. Judie Chiappone posted an image:
    04 Jul 2024
    I took this photo of Deb the first time I met her in her Solivita driveway one morning, and "socially interrogated" her as I often do with people I meet.  We were fast friends via email from that moment on.   She & Jim moved not long after that but our seemingly daily emails continued throughout.  So many friends have mention her humor and wit.  I found that it was like a "sneak attack"---I'd be enjoying what she had written and "BAM", out of the blue she's say something that just cracked me up---breathless, tears rolling, ---she got me again!   It was an honor to support her from afar as we exchanged regular "epistles" ---even in the worst of times.   Deb belongs in the "Most Unforgettable Characters" list, for sure.  A dynamo who expanded the thinking of doctors, bolstered anyone near her who was struggling and generously gave to homeless people all year around.   How fitting that the skies will light up tonight on this July 4th---simultaneously honoring an unstoppable light bearer who's now lighting-up heaven.  She left a trail of sparkling glitter, light and hope everywhere she went.  What an honor to call her my friend.
    I took this photo of Deb the first time I met her in her Solivita driveway one morning, and "socially interrogated" her as I often do with people I meet. We were fast friends via email from that moment on. She & Jim moved not long after that but our seemingly daily emails continued throughout. So many friends have mention her humor and wit. I found that it was like a "sneak attack"---I'd be enjoying what she had written and "BAM", out of the blue she's say something that just cracked me up---breathless, tears rolling, ---she got me again! It was an honor to support her from afar as we exchanged regular "epistles" ---even in the worst of times. Deb belongs in the "Most Unforgettable Characters" list, for sure. A dynamo who expanded the thinking of doctors, bolstered anyone near her who was struggling and generously gave to homeless people all year around. How fitting that the skies will light up tonight on this July 4th---simultaneously honoring an unstoppable light bearer who's now lighting-up heaven. She left a trail of sparkling glitter, light and hope everywhere she went. What an honor to call her my friend.

  7. Heike lit a candle:
    03 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 3, 2024 at 7:47:46 PM

  8. Dee and Rod lit a candle:
    02 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 2, 2024 at 7:11:36 PM

  9. Jerome m. Harris lit a candle:
    02 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 2, 2024 at 7:55:07 AM

  10. Dyora Kinsey says:
    01 Jul 2024
    Jim,
    My sincere sympathies to you and your family. I remember Deb from Ft. Monroe and had conversation with her by email a couple of times last year. I will always remember her as a pillar of courage and strength, how she handled adversity, kept the faith and managed to reassure me when I was ill with such a wonderful and positive outlook on life. May she rest in beautiful peace with the Lord.

  11. Dyora Kinsey lit a candle:
    01 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 1, 2024 at 7:11:37 PM

  12. Dennis Kennedy lit a candle:
    01 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 1, 2024 at 7:59:16 PM

  13. The Belli Children lit a candle:
    01 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 1, 2024 at 7:35:45 PM

  14. Robin Uzzle (Isman) lit a candle:
    01 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 1, 2024 at 7:07:36 PM

  15. Mark and Karen Belli lit a candle:
    01 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 1, 2024 at 7:55:16 PM

  16. Sandra Midkiff says:
    01 Jul 2024
    Dear Jim and Family...sincere sympathy in your loss. Debbie was a one of a kind...a smart , hard working, fun loving, great friend to me and folks in our Cadet Command family. Her keen sense of humor was a high point in many of my days that we worked together at Ft Monroe. There was never a dull moment. She will always be remembered fondly, and I was blessed to know her. God Bless you all and give you peace.

  17. Theo Myers lit a candle:
    01 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 1, 2024 at 7:21:32 AM

  18. Theo Myers says:
    01 Jul 2024
    Jim,
    Thank you for sharing Debbie with us. She will be missed greatly. She was a wonderful person to know and meet. She always had a big smile when you met her. I can't forget her rabbit bedroom shoes. Debbie is not in any more pain now. Debbie, thank you for the memories at HQ, Cadet Command.

  19. Lori Smith lit a candle:
    01 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 1, 2024 at 7:52:30 AM

  20. Robert Shepherd says:
    01 Jul 2024
    Deb, exhibited the Spirit of encouragement to all who knew her!❤️

  21. Robert Shepherd lit a candle:
    01 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 1, 2024 at 7:27:55 AM

  22. Darrell O. Hinson Sr. lit a candle:
    01 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 1, 2024 at 7:25:47 AM

  23. Thyrza & Jen lit a candle:
    01 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 1, 2024 at 7:08:25 AM

  24. Celeste Miller lit a candle:
    01 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 1, 2024 at 7:08:06 AM

  25. Betty W. Lambeth lit a candle:
    01 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 1, 2024 at 7:05:10 AM

  26. Elaine Krzanowski lit a candle:
    01 Jul 2024
    Lit since July 1, 2024 at 7:57:38 AM

  27. Jayne Murphy says:
    30 Jun 2024
    Deb,
    It was an honor to meet you and meet the elephants you loved so much. I will honor you by taking care of our girl Rebecca.

  28. Christa. Friedlander lit a candle:
    30 Jun 2024
    Lit since June 30, 2024 at 6:12:40 PM

  29. Jim Ainslie says:
    30 Jun 2024
    Thanks to all who sent good thoughts and prayers.

    If you feel inclined to send flowers or plants, please don't. Find a local food bank or other group that is helping others and give them assistance.

    I plan on holding a memorial in about a month or so, will send out date as soon as finalized. Do not feel that you must attend Debbie understands busy lives. Thanks to all who will keep Debbie's memory alive by telling stories about her

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